Life as a Marine Wife is, in one word, challenging. Waking up in the morning at 4 am to make my husband breakfast and a sack lunch, see him off to work, and then go back to bed for another 3 to 4 hours… It’s not easy spending so much time apart from the man of my dreams. Which is why when he IS home, I like to make every moment count by being the faithful wife he needs and deserves.
My journey toward becoming a Proverbs 31 woman began when he left for basic training. At the time I was living with my in-laws until my husband and I could be together at his permanent duty station. I became profoundly closer to God during that time I spent on my own; learning what it meant to rely on Him for comfort, growing in faith and beginning to realize what it meant to be someone’s wife. In the eight months my husband was in training, from basic, to School of Infantry (SOI), to Military Occupational Specialty school (MOS), I learned that I not only need God at the center of my life, but that I want him at the center of my marriage. My husband would write me letters while he was away telling me how all of the higher ups kept telling the new marines not to run off and get married because, “she’ll only love you on the 15th and the 30th,” or “50% of all marine marriages end in divorce…” Not the most re-assuring statements to hear as a new marine recruit who’s already been married for a year. The emotional damage control and low motivation I was left to handle was intense. But the cool thing about the whole situation is that my husband grew closer to God as well, and didn’t let the negative things people were saying influence him. He learned to cling to God’s word and we both began to value our marriage more as a gift from God, and not something to be taken lightly.
It wasn’t until we moved down to our permanent duty station at Camp Lejeune that I actually realized how valuable my husband really is to me. Our song has always been “Faithfully” by Journey (…’lovin a music man ain’t always what it’s supposed to be…’) and coincidentally (or not) the Marine Corps motto is Semper Fideles, Always Faithful. Surrounded by couples cheating and facing temptations while their spouses are on deployment, that motto couldn’t be more ironic… But I realized as a woman of God, if I’m faithful to Him first, and my husband second, my marriage is like “a cord of three strands…” which “…is not easily broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:12) and that’s why I am on my way toward becoming like the woman in Proverbs 31:10-31:
“10 The wife of a noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life
13 She selects wool and flax
and wrks with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar
15 She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
She can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her.
29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
So that’s my ultimate goal, and I have the rest of my married life to perfect it, starting now.