“A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.” Proverbs 31:1
Okay, I thought I could avoid this, but I guess I can’t… It’s time for a textual rampage against people with absolutely no respect for my marriage, me, or my husband.
It all started when the husband joined the USMC… In choosing to enlist, he made a decision and commitment that has completely changed our lives, our marriage, and most importantly, the way we view our relationship with each other and with God. I praise God for that. What I don’t praise God for are all the inappropriate Facebook messages and attempted friend requests via email/social media that my HUSBAND (important, my husband- we are in fact married) receives on a regular basis. The main reason for these requests is that the, for lack of a better term, and out of my dignity so that I may remain above reproach, girls in question- girls, not women… real women don’t behave that way– say that they just want to “support our troops.” By trying to undermine the marines’ marriages by getting in the way of a relationship you obviously know nothing about?? Let me take a few moments to just explain a little bit what MY marriage is all about.
“Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down,
His friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
and has no one to help him up!
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
Let’s look a little closer at this scripture shall we? It’s saying here in Ecclesiastes that we as human beings were made to be relational people; we were never intended to suffer loneliness. I am always there to support my husband. I am his constant companion. I am his strength in his times of weakness. I am his faith when he doubts. I point him toward the Lord when he needs guidance, and he does the same for me. A cord of three strands… Hmm… but it was just talking about how two are better than one…? Where did the number three come from? I’ll tell you. God. God is the third strand in our cord of marriage. He is the solid, and sure foundation that keeps us standing. That is the first reason those girls do not understand just how precious my marriage is- they do not know the love of the Almighty God.
“But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping,
he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh.
Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
The man said, ‘This is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man.’
For this reason a man will leave his father and other and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.”
Look at the significance of the symbolism here! The woman was made from Adam. That denotes a sense of possession. I’m not talking the kind of “1950’s barefoot housewife in the kitchen and pregnant, know your place” kind of possession, or even the “you are simply an object to me, now make me a sandwich and put on something slinky” kind of possession. I’m talking about the, “You were made from a part of me. We know each other intimately in a way that is sanctified by God. You are “bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh” and I will love and cherish and protect you as the precious creation you are, because you are a gift to me.” Ladies and gentlemen, I’m proud to announce that I have that 3rd kind of possession going on in my marriage. I am his, he is mine, and we are HIS. That is the second reason those girls do not understand the sanctity of my relationship- No one treats them that way.
“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from GOD?
You are not your own; you were bought at a price.
Therefore, honor God with your body.”
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
I HAVE MODESTY! My body is a gift to me from God, for my husband. And I will treat it as the precious vessel that it is. Shame on those girls who sacrifice their dignity and honor. Shame on them for using their bodies, their gifts from God for purposes that undermine the sanctity of marriage. That is the third reason they don’t understand my frustration- They are not valued as daughters in Christ, therefore they do not value themselves as such.
“Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.
For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.
Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy,
cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a
radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish,
but holy and blameless.
In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies.
He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body,
but he feeds, and cares for it, just as Christ does the church.–
for we are members of his body.
‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,
and the two will become one flesh.’
This is a profound mystery, but I am talking about Christ and the Church.
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself,
and the wife must respect her husband.”
This scripture may be a little difficult for some women to swallow, but that’s simply because they lack the understanding. Let me attempt to help with that… Submission does not mean the same as abuse. Let’s just clarify that right there. Submission in this context means that you do not usurp the authority given by God to your husband to lead and direct your household. After all, that is what brought about the fall of man. Adam was created first, Eve was created second, from Adam. Even the bone with which God created her had significance! The rib. Has anyone ever broken a rib? I have not personally, but I have been told by friends who have that it astounds them how incredibly painful a broken bone of such small size can be. Eve was taken from a place in Adam that is vulnerable. The rib cage protects vital organs. She was made to be Adam’s support. Think about using crutches- where do they go? Under your arm. Think of a marine carrying his buddy injured in combat… Where does he lift to support him? Assuming the injured marine is not on his fellow marine’s back, he’s probably under his arm, holding him up. Eve denied herself that privileged of being Adam’s support. In taking the apple, and giving it to Adam, she stole the gift of authority that was given to Adam by God to be her leader and protector. She took what was not rightfully hers and in so doing disrespected herself, her husband, and most importantly, God. Not only that, but the man is called to love his wife. He is not called to love his wife, but friend misguided and immoral girls who would interfere with and destroy his marriage. That’s not what the sanctity of marriage is. Part of what gets me so upset is the same thing that upsets me about people who are gay rights activists… They don’t understand what scripture is telling them. They refuse to acknowledge that their actions or beliefs aren’t what God intended. They refuse to accept that according to Christianity, their lifestyle is a perversion of a symbol that is meant to represent Christ’s relationship with the church, which is a holy and sanctified thing! And all of those celebrities who get married for 10 seconds in Vegas and then want a divorce or annulment are even worse! They make the rest of us look like hypocrites. Well, I’ve had enough. This is the fourth reason those girls upset me- They do not know what they are called to do or be by God, and they use sexuality as a means of manipulation rather than a precious gift that was meant to be shared by a husband and wife, united in Christ. And while I’m on that subject, how many of those “unions,” celebrity or otherwise, can even be said to be Christ-centered? hmm… think on that…
I am honestly 100% sick and tired of my marriage being disrespected. Back off. Leave my husband alone. It is disrespectful to me, it is disrespectful of the vows my husband and I made to each other, and it is disrespectful to God, who brought us together in perfect union. HOLY MATRIMONY! That’s what that means. It is a thing of God. I will not stand idly by and let those girls create stumbling blocks for my husband. Being away from home over 85% of the year is quite enough of a stumbling block if I do say so myself. I challenge those girls, those aspiring “models” to evaluate their lives. Are you happy? Rather, are you full of joy? Do you know what it means to be respected and loved? Would your parents be proud of you? If you had children, would you be ashamed to tell them what you do for a living? Would you be willing to sacrifice your life for another human being? Because I would. I would gladly give my life for my husband’s life and well-being. I pray that some day you get to experience that depth of love and commitment. I pray that you some day get to experience the joy of being totally and completely in love with Christ! I pray that if you do have children, you lead them in a path that is different from the one you’ve chosen for yourself. I pray that if you have children, you teach them self-respect and dignity, not the self-loathing manipulation and idolatry (that’s all pornography is) that you practice. I pray that when the inevitable brokenness, emptiness, and hollow, shallow feeling creeps up into your mind and haunts your every breath, you remember this post and the amazing saving, fulfilling, and redemptive power of the Lord, God Almighty and his son, Jesus Christ. Amen.